stupid dump pork!

got a phone call from a chinese stupid pork! first this stupid pork kept on blabbering in chinese with a rude tone. then i told the stupid pork i can't speak in chinese and whether we can communicate in bm (italic font is the translation). then the stupid pork screamed Dilecto! Dilecto! told the stupid pork my director is not in and i don't know when he will be in. the stupid pork screamed again saying how long work there??!! why duno??!! huh??!! u work there oso dunno anything for wat??!! what the heck! a few boom bang boom bang and still maintained my coolness and told the stupid pork "sir, you shouldn't say like that, i do not know his schedule and i am not his secretary and i can let him know you've called". silence for 3 seconds and then i've asked him again if there's any messages that i can take down. then the stupid dump pork screamed go and die lah!! and hanged up on me. one day .. just one fine day .... i bet that stupid pork will get it back and become a burnt roast pork. by the way, did some checking of my own, for heaven sake, why was that call transfered to me? being managers in a public listed company for what? can't even handle a small timer stupid pork!??! ... blardy ..

jokes on women, turn the table around

i've been receiving heaps of emails or listening to a whole lot of jokes about women lately. the latest comment/joke was that women = evil and women with pms = women with psychotic murderer symptom. i began to wonder, how come it sounds funnier for the blokes to make hilarious jokes about women being described as weaklings with daily traumas or a dope? *knock on the head* duhhhh ... realised that i've actually got a few rib-ticklers up my sleeves to get back to them.

• what do an anniversary and a toilet have in common?
  men miss them both
• why do men like BMWs?
  because they can spell it
• how many men does it take to change a light bulb?
  one ... men will screw anything
• why do men always look stupid?
  because they are stupid
• what's the thinnest book in the world?
  what men know about women
• men are like toilets...
  either vacant, engaged or full of crap

note to cheekypau - scientist should redo their research on apes evolving into men. it should be the theory of dogs actually evolved into men. notice the parallels ... tell a dog he's been bad, he goes to the corner and moan. tell a man off, he's off to the pubs and does the same.

dream job?

was just thinking .... if i aint doing a desk job, what could be my next option??

• maybe a masseuse - if you love pain, trust me, don't under estimate me because these hands of mine will give you pleasure. I know lots had enjoyed it and it's in demand but be warned that it's a total turn off when the moan starts kicking in. geeeeez, gives me goose bumps up to my spine. once that happens, you aint getting it again!
• maybe a babysitter - only to the pretty or cute or handsome little children who are smart and well-behaved. sorry but i hate ugly dirty looking kids with tantrums and green gunk running down their nostrils. i can't find any adult at the same kiddy level as me who enjoys sweet ice cream and cartoons and collecting stickers and cute toys and playing games.
• maybe a fashion designer - with a label called "cheeky purple world". purple panties, purple purse, purple mini skirt, purple bra, purple sunglasses, purple belts, purple flip flops, purple bikini wear, purple tops, purple hoodie, purple cap, purple garter, purple bags and etc.
• maybe a goddess - a lazy bum being pampered by a group of young handsome solid chest muscular dudes. 2 will be fanning me with feather fans, 1 will be feeding me a bowl of ice cream, 1 will be feeding me strawberries and grapes, 1 will be giving me manicure and pedicure, 1 will be giving me an oil massage and 3 will be giving me a full monty performance. all dressed in tight black leather thongs with a fluffy bunny tail and a bow tie :p~~~~~

sigh ... got carried away. maybe lack of ribena. love-sweet-purple-grapes.

ok

everyone is getting lazy nowadays. always loooking for a shortcut. even in communication. of all person, my chatterbox mummy. at times, if she could stand next to daffy duck, my gosh! the splattering sliva is unbeatable. today gotten an sms from my mummy which says "ok". and for goodness sake sms-ing can easily cause miscommunication (a fine line to the cross the line + misunderstanding zone). shouldn't do that :-

• if you've used dad's phone. we've actually ended up with a funny conversation of me replying "huh?". and dad replied "huh? to your huh?". and me asking again "huh? what's up with the 'ok' statement?". and dad replied again "huh? oh .... but that 'ok' was from your mum". then i would have to ask you the same question all over again.
• to crack my brains out. makes me wonder if there's any question beforehand and/or whether i was expecting a reply. plz don't torture my low deficiency brain cell.
• to crack my brains out for the second time. mummy's cool because i can ask and tell her anything. even about sex. but i don't want to cross the line and how to do that if i don't know how to answer back. imagine if i've asked "is it ok to have anal sex?"; ok. = any good tips?, ok? = well it was just a thought because blah blah blah, ok!!?! = i am sorry to ask and i get your point. ok = .......
• because you are a chatterbox. makes me want to ask you back if you are ok instead.

whatever it is, like i've said before, my mummy is always funny in her many weird ways and thanks for spicing up my life today. by the way, yes i am healthy and ok today.

cheeky blinky toys

meet my new toys. cheap and fun. it's so small and cute. about 2.5inch x 2.5inch. perfect! the nick name matches exactly to the animal's character. hehehe.

step 1 : place it anywhere you want to

step 2 : underneath it, slightly tap at the sensor.

step 3 : enjoy the 15 second *blink *blink *blink *BLINK!

(cool effects in the dark)

step 4 : it's waterproof! spice up &/or play with it while taking your bath!! it will light up all the way if the sensor touches water. even cool for parties. drop it into a bowl of water and tra-la ... who needs party lights.

worthy of thine name?

ever wondered .... "if i did not have a name, how could i identify myself? if i had no name, who would i be?"

can a mental characteristics of an individual be read from a person's name just as the characteristics of a chemical compound can be read from its chemical formula?? can someone enlighten me on how is it possible that through a name or date of birth, one can determine the mind, the pattern of thinking, the intelligence manifested or the life experiences encountered ....

does my name contain a long list of fine qualities? does it suit me? should i change it? a name is just a name? well, a search on my name reveals me as a person supposedly being musical and with artistic ability, good business judgment, and a sense of responsibility for the welfare of others. warm-hearted and understanding in the response to the needs and interests of those around me. always ready to help those in less fortunate circumstances. a weakness lies in the fact that i am deeply affected through my feelings for others and could suffer through worry and disturbed thoughts over matters that i can do nothing about.

what do you think? yes? no? yes? no?

ogle over 2006 world cup players

someone mentioned to me this week that the world has gone upside down bcos generally people nowadays seem to idolise aliens with supernatural powers ie. superman, spiderman, x-men etc. rather than being realistic and choose a real human being with normal human flaws.

superman my butt. even the movie couldn't catch my attention. it aint true that throughout the whole show i was distracted and/or busy focusing on his red tight underwear !! i'd rather ogle over some football players. there are innumerable blokes to choose from.

yummy yummy and feast yourself :p~~~~

David Beckham - England

Date of birth: 2 May 1975

Height: 182 cm

Weight: 74 kg

Position: Midfielder

Current Club: Real Madrid (ESP)

Andriy Shevchenko - Ukraine

Date of birth: 29 Sept 1976

Height: 183 cm

Weight: 73 kg

Position: Forward

Current Club: AC Milan (ITA)

Alessandro Del Piero - Italy

Date of birth: 9 Nov 1974

Height: 173 cm

Weight: 73 kg

Position: Forward
Current Club: Juventus (ITA)

Landon Donovan - US
Date of birth: 4 March 1982
Height: 173 cm
Weight: 67 kg
Position: Midfielder
Current Club: Los Angeles Galaxy (USA)

Fabio Cannavaro - Italy
Date of birth: 13 Sept 1973
Height: 175 cm
Weight: 72 kg
Position: Defender
Current Club: Juventus (ITA)

Cristiano Ronaldo: Portugal

Date of birth: 5 Feb 1985

Height: 184 cm

Weight: 75 kg

Position: Forward

Current Club: Manchester United (ENG)

wisdom ....

do not wait; the time will never be "just right"

start where you stand, and work with whatever tools you may have at your command, and better tools will be found as you go along.

Napoleon Hill

so my dear friends ... chargeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

click click click enter!

my other boss whom i also report to was sitting at my table with a big frown and a serious look on her face facing down while i had to do some other errands. she still had the same facial expression 10min later. had to ask her 'cos my work can't be that bad till she had to frown like that .... "yup ... how the heck could you do your work? i can't even see what's printed on your keyboard. no task is impossible for me but you've broken my 2006 record. i've practically went brain dead while trying to figure out how could you possibly do your typing. had to run back and forth to double check on my own keyboard".

then another comment made by my IT staff today (*wink wink, my sweet smile and charm gotten my company to replace my 1yr old computer to a better version :p), "wow!! errrmmmmm ... i think it's going to take a while for me to configure and install your new computer ..." had to ask again why. "b'cos i can't see a thing! how could you type? i know you are the first user and it still looks new but where are the alphabets??!!".

hmmmm .... silly me not to realise the condition of my keyboard ^_^

pau's joke of the week

• One day, siew pau and maggi mee had a big fight.
  
• maggi mee beat siew pau up until it had bruises on its pau body.
  
• siew pau lost in the fight and went back to tell all the paus family; kaya pau, tau sa pau, curry pau, and etc.
  
• so together.. all paus went to find maggi mee for revenge.
  
• on the way... they met spaghetti...
  
• so all paus ran to spaghetti and BEAT the hell up on spaghetti that spaghetti can't say a word.
  
• spaghetti then scream..."WHAT DID I DO? I don't even know you all"???
  
• then the siew pau say??.."HEH! MAGGI MEE! don't think I can't recognise you after you do REBONDING!"

mate's bday night out

it's my mate's bday night out!! what a cool and funny and crazy bunch of gals to hang out with. just love it when someone could put a smile on my face. i was laughing throughout the whole night with my drunky gal friend's character. had a quarter glass of yummy white wine. didn't want to drink and drive plus had to be sane enough to babysit 2 clowns. hop to 3 venues in one night. both gfs couldn't remember what happened at the later part of the night. hmmmmmm ... want me to tell you the juicy story?? *hint *hint ... it's a very very very naughty and interesting night ..... hehehe

oh ya!!! also a shout out to derek "happy birthday!!!". posting this at your request. nahhh!!! consider this as your bday gift. come down and visit me and we can have fun like in the pic. just like the time when you've puked like mad. HAHAHHAA!

philippine and i

constantly being asked ... "of all places, why philippines?" a classic story that my mummy keeps reminding me, ".. don't touch the candle flames or you will get burnt and suffer pain". being stubborn, touched it, hurt myself, cried, know how it feels .. but .. went and touch it 2 more times just to be sure (i aint no sadist) .. hahaha. well, same theory, i want to see the place with my own eyes although was adviced it's a dangerous area. heard that somewhere in philippines, a bomb explosion 12 hours before we've actually touched down. contrary to what you guys thought, overall the trip was not bad at all. flew there without any accomodation reservation. upon touch down, without any hastle, picked makati business centre to stay, took a bus, then a mrt, then within 15min found our walk-in hotel. behold, a journey by 2 daring and stubborn female chics...

found this decent business hotel which costs rm240 per person for 3 nights and 4 days. the shower pressure and hotel service is darn good. not use to the "yes, mam can i help you""no problem mam""welcome mam" mam mam mam

the best meal and i'm fully satisfied. loveeeeee the drink. jasmine & garlic rice, lechon babi (roast pork), gata sigarillas (4 angled beans), gatang tilapia (fish), bottomless ice tea = total rm30

mont kiara atmosphere with a live band. their voice, unbelievably good, 3 thumbs up if only i have an extra thumb. so fresh! nilasing na hipn (prawn ... too hungry and ate half already), pinakbet (fish), pritong pla pla (vege), garlic rice = total rm37

pathetic but 65% of our pic were taken in the dressing room cos we've shopped and shopped and shopped (70% of our time). they have more stuff on top of what you could find in our own country!!!! just name it!!! cheap and good too. i've practically went nuts.

hard rock cafe. in a mall. not our day because the band were average and couldn't play the latest songs. wonder if the standard dropped. rm35 per entry with 2 coupon of drinks. i drank ice tea (huge!!!) and a bottle of beer. got bored and bought yummy haagen dazs to lick on our way back to the hotel (without fail every night for our 15min walk).

had a fun night out. i hate beer but this will do. not bad. rm6 for one bottle.

cafe havana. our day because a famous salsa musician band was playing. heard they've played at genting for a 3 months contract deal. my salsa lessons sort of paid off. people were all friendly.

nearly missed the flight but we were street smart. why must the immigration officer always choose to have a small talk whenever i want to check in? i don't like to cause a hold-up. thinking about it, i should have freaked out and tell the mrt ticket officer or bus driver or security or taxi driver or sales person or etc to cut the crap and hurry up. reached "home sweet home" at 11pm and had to work the next day -_-"